Christmas 2010

OK, so I know today is Christmas Eve and tomorrow is Christmas. But I'm not in the Christmas-mood. Partially because when I think of "Christmas" I think of having family together, a big-celebration. I think of grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and all the dogs. As I grew up we always just had our own little Christmas because everybody else lived up North, and we never wanted to battle the weather and the roads to get up there. But the past few winters we did get to go up to Iowa. So now when I think of Christmas, I think of family. I think of grandma's and grandpa's, aunts and uncles, cousins and dogs. I'm going to miss not being there this year.

The typical small simple Suddendorf Christmas has never bothered me. It still doesn't "bother" me, but I'd much rather be up North where my family is. I h-a-t-e the snow (i seriously despise it. but that is another story for another time), and i hate the cold, and i hate that i can't wear flip flops. But I'd deal with that anyday to spend time with the family I rarely get to see.

I still remember Christmas when I was three or four. We were in Ozarks and my entire mom's half of the family was there. I remember I got my first pair of roller-blades and my aunt's and uncles spent hours teaching me how to ride. I remember watching everybody else play "Hand and Foot" for hours upon hours, always wishing I was old enough to play with them. I'd sit on Aunt Amy or Becky's lap trying to teach myself how to play the ever-confusing game. It'd be a few years before I did learn how to play. But regardless, I remember the family gatherings, how everybody was crowded together, and the time we spent together. We have a family-picture of me with all my aunts and uncles and my brother. Now, I have a cousin that age. I think back to the Christmas I remember most of my childhood, and think that I was her age. If this is the Christmas she most remembers, I'm sad that I won't be there to share the memories with her.

All of my family lives up North. Either in Iowa or Michigan. We are the only ones who live down here. And don't get me wrong, I l-o-v-e Texas. But living down here means I don't get to see my family nearly as much as I like. I'm finally getting reconnected with my Daddy's side (I hadn't seen those cousins in eight years) and would have loved to been able to spend Christmas with them. That would have been the best Christmas present, spending time with my family.

So today I was thinking. What if next year all I ask for is to see my family. I'd love for everybody to come down here, even though I know not everybody will be able to. Come on, the weather is nicer down here anyways. And it'll be my last Christmas before I'm in college. It'll be my last Christmas legally as a kid. So that's what I want. That's all I'm asking for next year, to see my family at Christmastime.

Now as I head off to church to make the most of this Christmas, I look forward to this time next year, when hopefully, all my family will be getting ready to load up and go to the Christmas Eve service with me.

Merry Christmas ya'll.