When is it Time?

When I was 3 I learned how to swim. I wasn't very good at it. I was the 6 and under that hung on the lane rope every 2 seconds. I was the 6 and under that the parents would clap for, because I had finally finished a 25 and the meet could move on. I was the 6 and under who could never manage to get all my hair in a swim cap, and always looked very dorky and out of place. I was the 6 and under who would always love to swim backstroke because it didn't involve putting my face in the water. I was THAT 6 and under. (Don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about). But I was in love with the water, and nothing was going to change that.

A lot has changed in 14 years. Instead of 30 minutes a day, I have reached a maximum of 7 hours a day (only when polo and swimming were going on at the same time). Instead of 25's we now peak off around 7,000 yards a practice. Instead of the 6 and under that would have gotten lapped on a 25 if that was possible, I now compete and it's exciting (and sometimes [rarely] even lap other people). I'm now a pro at putting on swim caps (thanks, I know it's a real accomplishment), and I now think I look more natural in one than sometimes I do when I wear makeup and do my hair nice. I still love backstroke, but now it's because it's a pretty stroke, and I'm decent at it. The thing is, I'm not THAT swimmer anymore who loves swimming.

I have figure out that there's a difference between loving swimming, loving your teammates, and loving your coaches. Unfortunately, I just don't love swimming anymore. And I really wish that I could fall back in love with it, and who knows, it could happen. I don't find the excitement in practicing like I used to. I don't find technique weeks fun anymore. Honestly, sometimes I don't even love my team like I used to. All of my best friends used to be at the pool, and I'd call them my second family. Thankfully Renee and my little swimming sister Jacy are still there to keep me sane. In all truth, if it wasn't for my coaches Dennis and Kris, I would have been long gone.

Dennis and Kris know me better than anybody on the planet I can honestly say. There were points last year when they knew more about my day to day life than my parents did, simply because I saw them more. Coach Kris can read me like a book. I can have a smile on my face and be playing the act well, but he KNOWS when something is up. And the thing is, he doesn't just know something is up, he cares and he does his best to offer his "big brother" advice as I call it. And he will never let me leave if I'm not smiling. Coach Dennis is like my second dad. As proud of me as he is when I drop time, or keep up during practice, he is also proud when I tell him I got accepted into A&M, or that I aced a test. The fact is, they care for me in the water AND out. Almost all the time now, they are the reason I come to practice. Not because I have some passionate desire to swim. It's because I want to see my coaches.

How do you call it quits? How do you leave behind something that has made you who you are. How do you give up something that you have worked 14 YEARS for? This question ponders my head constantly, as I know the end is coming real near. There is a very real possibility that I'll be done in February. As done as I am with swimming, I still don't know how I will be able to give that up. I know one thing for sure. Just because I'm not swimming, doesn't mean Dennis and Kris still won't be a very big part of my life. I just can't picture it any other way.

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There. I feel better. Weird how blogging does that huh? Now off to go do that homework!!!

This Deserves It's Own Blog Post...

I GOT A 96 ON MY CALCULUS BC TEST!!

That is all :)

A good day :)

While blow-drying my hair in the locker-room an Energizer from Cho-Yeh came on my iPod, and so I did the energizer dance around the locker room :)

In government I found out I got a 100 on my Federalism Essay!! (Thank you Grandpa Zieman for ensuring that government runs in the blood :P)

Ready Set Teach was fun as normal, we go to the elementaries a week from tomorrow!

Calculus Test wasn't too hard. I wasn't for sure on 4 of the multiple choice parts (I had it narrowed down to 2 answers though) and according to what everybody else got, I guessed lucky on 4 out of the 4 questions!

Anatomy was a joke. We watched presentations all period long :)

English was easy. We took a quiz which I thought was simple, and then had time to work on whatever we needed to.

I made Breast Cancer Awareness Month (October) ribbons during JV Swimming in preparation for next weeks RFL meeting.

NHS meeting after school was only 15 minutes, and I'm pretty sure this is the only one in which we didn't get yelled at for attendance... (maybe because it is only the first meeting of the year?)

KSBJ played good "driving with the windows down and the radio up" music on my way home form school.

And I have NO mandatory homework due for tomorrow!! Although I'll probably try and get ahead for the rest of the week :))

Today was DEFINITELY a good day :D

A Phone Call

After a seemingly not too great day, I have to admit, the past 2 hours have been good!

For the seemingly not too good.
-I spilled the Communion grape juice down my shirt while serving Communion for the first time ever.
-Megan went back to College Station after church.
-After lunch I did homework from 1-4:30 straight. Minimal facebook interuptions.
-Got irritated over itunes stuff. itunes is not my best friend.
-Youth group was a mess and didn't provide the typical pre-crazy week destressor that it normally does.
-Came home in a grouchy mood
-Had a "ten minute" family meeting which resulted in 45 minutes of unhappiness with all 4 of us in the confined office and some tears as I got very frustrated.

That was the not seemingly good part of the day.

The past two hours though...
-Desperate Housewives came on which ended the family discussion.
-Rachel from camp called me and we talked for a good half hour.
-I finished my 9 typed pages of answers to questions over Tess of the d'Urbervilles. (HEY! If you are looking for a good book, don't try this one!)
-I went to work a couple of calc problems before our test tomorrow, and realized that not only did I remember the long way to work out the problems, but the short cuts finally made sense too!!!

*Sigh*. This week is going to be crazy, but another weekend is only 5 more days away!!!

What goes on in the mind of a 17 year old....

Exhausted: I physically can't make my body go any longer! School + swimming + minimal sleep means I'm WAY too tired!!

Overjoyed: Just spent a few hours with Megan and Renee! Even though I swim Renee everyday practically for club practice, there is just something about the three of us being together.

Relieved: I WILL be attending Texas A&M University! Even though I knew I would get in because of class rank, the fact that I got my letter took a load off my back.

Stressed: School is kicking my butt! I've never really had trouble with math, I mean it wasn't my favorite thing ever, but it wasn't hard. Calculus, that's just hard. Spent 3 hours doing calc homework Thursday night in a desperate attempt to figure out what is going on.

Excited: for week two of church at West Road property!

Un-excited: forcing myself to read a little bit more of Tess of the d'Uberville's tonight, in the effort to be done with enough of the book tomorrow to do the REALLY long reading assignment/question dumb thingy.

Camp-sick: I love that place so much, and I desperately want to go back and see everybody and be in that same Christ-centered environment.

Blessed: to have the Cho-Yeh community of friends that I talk to all the time, and who are always there for me. It's like a different kind of friendship, only camp people would understand.

Enthusiastic: What I am trying my hardest to be about high-school swimming this year.

Pumped: for the new Water Polo season next semester!

Lucky: that government seems to run in the Zieman side of the family, so government class seems really easy/natural to me while everybody else is stressing out about it. (but it's okay... i make up the stressing-out thing through Calculus BC)

Loved: my friends and family are the best.

Homesick: for my family up North!! It seems like FOREVER since I have seen ya'll.

Refreshed: Blogging always makes me take a breath and calm down, realizing life will be okay :)

Off to read for 15-20 minutes then sleeeeeeeep :)

Ready... Set... TEACH!!

Ready, Set, Teach! (From now on... RST), is definitely the most amazing class I have EVER been in! Everyday for 2nd and 3rd period I get to sit in a classroom that is decorated like an elementary classroom and learn how to be a teacher! We actually got to start doing teacher-type-stuff last week. We made a lesson plan, and taught a lesson to the class! My lesson was on symmetry, so I started off by reading "It Looked Like Spilt Milk", then teaching the children (aka... 12 juniors and seniors) how to tell if a shape has symmetry by folding it in half. So... I had di-cutted out a square, rectangle, and triangle for everybody to fold and see how many lines of symmetry they had. After that each kid got 2 dicuts of capital letters of the alphabet, and had to determine if those to shapes were symmetrical. Then the letters were called up to the board, and were sorted between having symmetry, and not having symmetry! In the end, I made two "Spilt Milk" shapes and had 2 people show me where they would be symmetrical. It was SO much fun!!!

On Monday we learned about bulletin boards, and so we had to design our own "mini-bulletin-board". Mine was SO cute! It said "Sailing off into Second Grade" with sailboats and tissue paper. Then on the sailboats it said what subjects the students would be learning this year! It was adorable :)



There is only one problem. I would MUCH rather look at cute ideas for bulletin boards, or be creative experimenting with tissue paper to make boards, think of cute lessons, gape at all of my mom's children books that I used to make fun of, or just think of fun ideas for teaching than do my other homework.. for example CALCULUS, or reading for English! GAH!

I can't wait to go to Millsap on October 5th and start teaching in my Kindergarten class! It's SO exciting!!!!

**There Mary Kathryn... I blogged :P**

The Loudest and Proudest Member of the Fighten Texas Aggie Class of 2015!

WELL... If the title doesn't explain it all, I don't know what does because...

I just got officially accepted into Texas A&M!!! Majoring in Elementary Education :)

WHOOP!!!

So... now all the UT stuff can get booted out of my house... it's an Aggie house!

Saturday nights aren't going to be so quiet anymore...

When A&M and UT are playing... It isn't going to be so quiet in the Suddendorf household anymore.

Tasks are now delegated by score differentials. For example...

*KJ barks*
Kole: "I'm winning 27-7"
Kylie: "I'm winning 45-16. Start walking!"
OOOOHHH it's very interesting :)

6 class periods without talking... blech!

1st Period--> Group government "mini-project". Simple. Easy period.

2nd/3rd Period--> Guest speaker from Millsap, so had to be quiet and listen to saftey and stuff for 2 periods. Luckily, she was fun and energetic.

4th Period--> Calc Test.. Think I did okay? Maybe? Hopefully?

5th Period--> Anatomy Test... yeah. um.. about that. NEWSFLASH. I'm a senior. I don't remember every nitpicky detail from biology freshman year and chemistry sophmore year. That wasn't fun and won't be pretty.

6th Period--> English essay. So, I read the 2 poems and started to write the compare/contrast essay. Got halfway through paragraph two, and realized that I had misread the poems (or atleast thinking I misread the poems) so wrote an entirely new essay. But everybody I talked to had all written something completely different. So either I'll do well because it was original, or do horrible because I missed the point of the essays.

7th Period--> JV swimming, but coaches weren't there, so we had my all-time-least-favorite-sub EVER. And had to be silent. OK, come on, ATHLETICS. 7TH PERIOD. FRIDAY. We aren't a quiet group! So I figured taking a nap would be considered quiet. NOPE! "no heads on desks, this isn't JV Sleeping". Um correct, it's JV SWIMMING (because we were totally doing that... bad analogy Mrs. Carter), as to which I'm not a member of!

So now I have the music jamming and am enjoying this Friday afternoon. I have work tonight, then home to SLEEP! Unloading chairs at the new church tomorrow morning. And then spending the rest of the weekend reading 200 some pages for English. OH JOY!!

Bring it on Calculus!

OH yeah! That's right! I'm challenging you, Mr. Fourth Period Calculus Test! I know how to solve indeterminate limits. I know how to find the possible values of delta. I know the epsilon-delta definition of a proof, AND how to apply it. I know what limit statement can come from an epsilon-delta definition statement. I know how to give limit statements from graphs and tables. I know how to find limits algebraically and through "number crunching". I know true/false truth tables and even know the "whys" they are true. I know how to apply the squeeze theorem.

Therefore, first calculus test of the year, I am going to own you. Ace you.

^^ How is that for some positiveness! (After this week, if I get a mid-B I'll be thoroughly enjoyed!)

Be waiting for tomorrow's update!! :P

Coolest Room Award!

Just won the coolest room award in our house.. SAY WHAT?!?! Yepp, that's right :)

Thanks random guy who came in and took pictures of our house!

Nobody's Guaranteed a Tomorrow

When the swimming world was struck again when a beloved coach, Coach Allen, was killed this morning, it made me realize (again, as I realized it a few days ago while reading) that nobody is guaranteed a tomorrow.

James 4:13-14 --> "Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes".

James is so right. As harsh as that may sound, comparing our life to a mist, it's reality. We never know when God's work with us will be done, or how much longer we have left on this Earth. Nobody is guaranteed another day here.

Matthew 6:34 --> "Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself...".

Just live for the moment, and live every moment for our God. Because in the end, it isn't the time we spend here, it is what we do with the time we are given here. So live every second to the full, because we don't know what tomorrow brings.

Challenge Accepted

So after being home from camp, I have kept up with and stayed in touch with a couple of the people I met there. Last night another counselor that I worked with challenged me to "seek the Lord in everything [I saw]" today. Well, being the competitive/non-challenge-backing-downer I am, I replied back "Challenge Accepted". And WOW what a difference it made!

I don't think I have ever seen God in the number of ways I did today.

When it was storming and rainy, I saw God's beauty.
When there was no air-conditioning today in 2nd, 3rd, or 7th period, I definitely thanked God for what I do have, and prayed for those who don't ever have air-conditioning.
When I was sitting in class bored with anatomy, I thanked God for the ability I have to go to school.
When I got a semi-upset text from a friend and was able to respond with an "I love you!" text, I saw how God uses each of us to help out everybody else.
When I was reading poetry in English, I saw God's majestic ways through the language of the author.
When I burned myself how many times making RFL ribbons, I was thankful for the chance to fight for others, and saw how my own God fights for me every second of the day. (Exodus 12:12!)
When the rain stopped just long enough for me to run to my truck without getting soaked, I saw how God is always looking out for us [even if it is just providing a break in the rain so we don't get our new shoes wet].

And what a difference it made! Instead of...
-YUCK it's raining and gross!
-I'm going to die without air conditioning, it's SO hot in here!
-Anatomy is joke, why am I wasting my time in this class?
-Stinks you're having a bad day... Mine's going excellent!
-I don't really care about "Ode to the Grecian Urn"... poetry's lame.
-OWWWW I just burned myself making ribbons that nobody is going to appreciate!
-Great, now I'm going to have to walk through puddles because it has rained all day!

What a difference a new perspective makes! So I challenge you to take up what I was challenged with "seek the Lord in everything". You'll never know how different your day may turn out!!

Studying for Government with Renee

So the game plan was to study for government today. That was really going to happen. I was SO determined.

WELL...

Renee ended up coming over this afternoon for some much needed best-friend time. I told her to bring her homework because I knew we both needed to get stuff done.

WELL...

I ended up reading a children's book to her (I'm afraid I'm becoming more and more like my mother everyday...) and then began to teach her my government notes because I needed to study for my test, and she had nothing to do!

So I used my "teacher voice" as she calls it (drats. I am turning into my mother) and explained to her the first few pages of government notes. Then she decided to take my notes and quiz me over the section I HADN'T looked at! And ask me questions such as "Constitution". Not "what is the constitution" or "who wrote the constitution" or "what is the purpose of the constitution"... NOPE just "Constitution".

WELL...

I'm not sure how much productive studying was actually done. I'm pretty sure the answers I was giving her in "Kylie's World Language" was pretty much exactly the same thing as what my notes said in "Cutsinger Government Language" but who knows. So needless to say, some more studying needs to be done tonight!

WELL...

After giving up on government, Renee and I decided to skype the other best friend Megan (who's up in College Station now) and talked to her for a good 45 minutes. Not like ANY of us had anything we needed to do... NAH! Renee didn't have to read a book for English to get ahead. NAH! Megan didn't have any college-stuff to do. NAH! I didn't have a government test tomorrow that I needed to ace... NAH!

It was a much needed girl-time though, and I'm very glad I had it. But now I MUST STUDY GOVERNMENT!!!