Interruptions

I have always been one to keep my thoughts to myself. My freshman and sophomore year was spent with these thoughts and emotions bottled up, never being expressed. I would write more than anybody knew as a way to get out everything that was seemingly trapped in my head. I had a camp friend call me out on that very thing at the beginning of my junior year, and then started this blog in December of that same year. I got better about talking about what I thought: about my day, about what I was looking forward to, about what all was going on in that often not-so-normal brain of mine.

Tonight, I realized why I always had the standardized response to any question... "How was your day?" "How are you?" "How's your year going?" "How are things going with your friends?" "How is swimming going? How about work". The answer was ALWAYS "fine". My day was fine, I was fine, my year was going fine, my friends were fine, swimming and work were fine. Life was fine.

The definition of fine is simply put as "alright". Fine is a word that requires no further conversation, but can express a wide variety of emotion.

So this afternoon/evening I had a lot on my mind that I was talking about. About water polo and possibly not having a team, about anatomy and catching my teacher jacking me of 20 points on a test, about a Quidditch club at Cy-Falls that has it's first meeting on Wednesday. About a wide variety of things that would have answered the "how was your day" question much better than "fine".

All afternoon not a sentence could be spoken without somebody butting in. All afternoon. When somebody butts in and asks the person I'm speaking to a question of not 9-1-1 emergency and the person I'm speaking to answers them and begins having a conversation with them, I feel as if they didn't really care how my day was. I know they probably do, and might not have realized that they cut me off. They might not have even realized when they in fact cut me off themselves. We're human, I get it. But today I realized that maybe that is why the answer has always been "fine". There is no way that you can be interrupted in that one syllable response!

So there, there is my frustrations poured out in a blog post!! Now off to do homework, as my camp-twin and I telepathically pinky-promised each other that we weren't going to let senioritis get the best of us this week!